Author, NY Times #1 Bestseller, Life's Little Instruction Book
When couples marry today, there’s only a 50-50 chance the marriage will endure. Divorce rates remain near their all-time highs. Depending whose statistics you choose to believe, as many as 70% of marriages will experience "cheating" one or more times during their existence. Nearly a third of all children under 18 live in single-parent households. Nearly 8 million of these children live with single parents who have never been married. The social support network formerly provided by the extended family has virtually disappeared from contemporary life.
Clearly, doing more of the same thing and expecting different outcomes no longer makes sense.
The world is full of people whose notion of a satisfactory future is, in fact, a return to the idealized past.
Canadian novelist, essayist, playwright and educator
was founded at the dawn of the new millennium (July 2000) to help people create
lasting intimate relationships that will work in our present world. We are a research and
educational organization, guided by distinguished researchers, academics, clinicians, and other
professionals, and devoted to studying and educating the public about the various
new forms of intimate relationships being chosen in today's world. We are also dedicated to
supporting the proposition that competent adults have a basic human right to choose for
themselves the form their intimate relationship should take, and to be given education
and support to help them make that choice work for them.
We believe the proven cost in human distress, endangered children, broken homes, and social upheaval inherent in a reflexive demand for "monolithic monogamy" has simply become too high to bear.
Convictions are more dangerous enemies of the truth than lies.
tens of millions of responsible, well-adjusted people are seeking out and living new ways of relating that don't
embrace the traditional model of "one man, one woman, sexually/emotionally exclusive, legally bound for life."
All of these choices, when practiced consensually and freely among adults, deserve respect and social support. They also need the kind of empirical research to discover and promulgate "best practices" that the old monogamous marriage model has enjoyed for decades. Finally, there needs to be empirical research to help demolish unfounded stereotypes and prejudices that work to inhibit complete freedom of relationship choice. We seek to support the attainment of all three objectives.
We honor and
respect those who freely choose monogamous traditional marriage. It is
unquestionably a valid choice for many. Nevertheless, we equally and
firmly believe it
is time to lay aside prejudice, inflexibility, ignorance and the
insistence that humanity in all its wondrous diversity must adhere
to a single acceptable model of intimate relationships, or do without.